What if the fact that life feels hard sometimes, is much more indicative of your sensitivity than your competence?
Waves (or storms) of fear, uncertainty, worry, and doubt, are an inevitable part of an honest human life, especially if what you're doing really matters.
They don't mean that you're not good enough, prepared enough, accomplished enough (I'll just do one more course), perfect enough (but I still struggle sometimes), or that the thing you want to do, or be, or have, is flawed.
They mean that you are human.
And probably that you really care.
There are things that are hard that feel pointless. And things that are hard that feel so worthwhile.
Knowing what those things are is really helpful in navigating the inevitable storms that are likely to surface in any worthwhile endeavour (such as the crafting of a life that you want to live).
Your values are your compass when the storms set in - they give you direction & purpose when you've momentarily forgotten, or when the voices of doubt get loud.
This workshop is about discovering what those things are for you, so that no matter how loud and convincing the inner-diatribes, or uncomfortable your feelings to the contrary, you've got a host of tools to help you unhook, stay grounded, and keep you moving forward from a curious, kind, and embodied place.
"Every storm runs out of rain"
When things get uncomfortable we tend to do 1 of 2 things:
1) Get completely overcome, or lost in unhelpful thinking
Which basically means that we accept the limited or self-defeating thoughts as real and true, and let them boss us around. Our little boat gets thrashed about. It might even feel as if we're drowning.
This sucks, because it leads us to doubt our worth, or, worse still, to confuse our worth with our apparent success or failure.
2) We rail against the difficulty - we avoid, escape, suppress, or deny
Some of these strategies might be useful in moderation (such as Yoga, or red wine...), but when used to excess the cost is high, because it's actually really exhausting to keep running from ourselves, and the things we deeply care about.
Think procrastination, unhealthy perfectionism (a personal favourite), having the same argument with your partner day after day, as well as all of the less-than-loving habits we get into when we feel anxious, or stuck.
But what if there was another way?
What if we could meet ourselves right where we are, with kindness, curiosity, empathy and compassion?
What if we could get some space around the difficult thoughts and feelings for just long enough to remember that that is all they are?
What if we could 'drop anchor'... following our senses and our breathing back into connection with the actual moment that we find ourselves in? And from there, recover our capacity to witness or observe without getting lost or caught up?
What would still feel meaningful? Significant? Important? Worth fighting for?
What could we not give up on, without losing our Soul in the process?
This exploration of Values is key, in re-directing our attention away from the drama of what we do not want, and course-correcting towards what really moves us.
Come and join me for this workshop if you're sick of running in circles, and ready to commit to the right kind of hard.
Here's what we'll cover:
~ What it looks like when we either obey or struggle against difficult thoughts, feelings and sensations - the kind of language we use, & the predominant sensations we describe.
~ Some of the costs or effects of these inefficient & unhelpful responses to difficulty.
~ What's required to unhook, and how to nurture those life-giving habits.
~ Simple tools from both Yoga & Psychology for getting space; for defusing or untangling from harmful or self-defeating dialogues &/or overwhelming emotions.
~ Simple, readily available tools for contacting the present moment, and cultivating self awareness.
~ Kindness and self compassion as essential balancing qualities to awareness, and how nurturing generosity in our relationship to self, spills over into all the others.
~ How to recognise the difference between coercive or punitive motivation (that which stems from 'not-good-enoughness' or lack), versus that which is rooted in self love and curiosity.
~ Values, or Intentions, and how they serve to organise our choices, for the better.
Get the mini-course
What's Included? The Live workshop recording, pdf slideshow (16 slides), comprehensive Values exercise, Extra resources + Bonus guided grounding Pranayama (23mins)
When can I start it? Right now - get immediate access from purchase
How long does it take? The workshop is 1hr 08mins, and the Values exercise can take as long or as short as you want it to.
How much? AUD $57
For how long can I access the material? You've got 90 days from purchase, plus it's downloadable for keeps, so, forever if you like.
Oh and ps. I hear you. The overwhelm is very real.
The thought of more self improvement... of juggling even one more thing when the pace & complexity of modern life already feels like an assault on your senses, and the divvying up of time between Self care and All Else care a precarious if not impossible balance to strike. To be clear: This class is not about improving yourself, because there's absolutely nothing wrong with you. It's about discovering ways to struggle less. To move with and through difficult thoughts & feelings, with curiosity and patience, so that you don't get completely derailed from what matters, nor hurt yourself more in the process.
Because how much time do you reckon you spend lost in self-critical diatribes about your age, weight, abilities, success (or lack of), parenting, or partnering skills? Or railing against the discomfort you feel, convinced that if you were getting it right then it wouldn't need to feel so hard?
But what if it is just hard, and that's OK?
What if the discomfort we feel sometimes could actually serve us to stay open, attentive, compassionate and resourceful? What if it was actually a reasonable cost for the experience of full participation?
As Pema Chodron teaches:
“Everything that occurs is not only usable and workable but is actually the path itself. We can use everything that happens to us as the means for waking up”.
It's such a magical, tender, and brave inquiry.
And I'd love to share it with you.